i'mma gonner...

Today....chinese....omg....raining so heavily when taking chinese exams....okay, after writing the essay, I'm like, what the? The first paragraph is like exactly the same as the second, third and forth... Hais... The the wind blew away my question paper~ ended up in the drain... Wen't down to look for it, but didn't bother to pick it up, as if God was telling me that its useless, I'm a gonner.... Moral was whatever~ i dont care anymore...

Back to some of my personal thoughts, I kinda realised that my existance ruins everyone's life, I ruin happiness and bring sadness... I make people misarable... I hurt people... I created negativity for people... I'm sorry, for everything, stop anything and everything that involves me, I'm a gonner, I'm a sore loser... I'm a faliure... I'm nothing... Just a piece of trash...

I never knew that I would hurt you... Always thought you could take jokes, I looked back on these few days and the attitude I treated you, yea, I was really horrible PLUS terrible, I suck, I'm sorry, I take back everything, I can't turn back time, I can't change myself... Kinda felt like crying when I was typing this post, cuz you are someone I love, the bestest friend I have ever had in my entire life... And I don't wanna ruin our relationship... I'm sorry...

I'm a terrible person... I know that... What to do? What can I do? I suck, I'm not awesome... The best thing about me... Is that I am great in hiding the truth... The more you see me smile, the more unhappy I am, the more you see me laugh, thats how much I'm dying inside... When you see me emo, you know that I'm dead and my heart stopped beating... Now, I reached my bottom line, God, help me, now, I dont know what to do anymore...

Rain... Wash my tears away...

Wind... Blow me away...

Thunderstorm... Take me away...

Take me away from making people suffer... I deserve no mercy... I don't deserve to live...

Send me away with the words of a love song... NAH~ I'll leave... With "I'm sorry" written to everyone... Sorry (for) everyTHin....... If you get what I mean...